Thinking...
Been doing some thinking these few days, not that I don't think normally, but I feel that maybe I should take things a little less serious. And the reason? It doesn't pay when I am overly concerned with things I hold most dearly to. The more I feel more worried or am concerned, the more I feel that I am taken granted for. Sometimes, that may be a good thing, as I feel my importance. But when the whole world thinks that everything will go well, and there's no point worrying, and I am the only one running around like some mad guy, I should just follow suit and enjoy my own sweet time.
I think I haven't treated myself good enough. I should just pamper myself sometimes. Why would I care for the rest of the world when they can take care of themselves.
It's like when you are working your head off in the office, and everyone's thinking you should be there and doing the things you should. It's like when you are so concerned with the outcomes of stuff when the rest of the world is like "don't worry'.
It just so tiring when so many things are in your head and you are not appreciated any little bit.
And I am really exhausted.
Movie Watching
Finally I get to watch Spiderman-3 last night with my JC band kakis at Tampines. There are mixed reviews about this movie. Some said its really really good, but others said its quite disappointing. For me, I like the action-packed second half of the movie. The gals like the evil but good looking bad guys, but I feel the acting could have been much better. Also, I felt that there are too many characters introduced at one go, and hence the development of character (besides Spiderman itself) is somehow forgone.
In all, it is not bad for those who like the action scenes, but the story line could have gone for a more in-depth plotting.
Insecurity
I have always wanted to make this entry a long long time ago. But never am brave enough. I guess this lovely evening, the mood is just right, and I am purely bored that I decided to make this entry. Maybe, not entirely bored as I am watching Heroes now on TV. By the way, Heroes is a nice serial drama and if there's a chance, you should watch it.
Ok back to my original topic. I always feel insecure about myself, of how I look, how I talk, how I act, how I stand, almost everything. And sometimes, this insecurity has taken over me quite a bit. It will lead to the unnecessary moodiness. It has got better recently, and the effects have not got me into depression, which I felt it some time ago. The feeling is bad, and somehow, when I feel insecured or inconfident, things will somehow go wrong. And when I am not confident, it will show very clearly. My speech stammers, my face turns red, I fluster, and there is no spirit in my eyes.
I need to overcome this. I need to believe in myself. It's always easier said than done.
I am feeling ok. I am not down now. If I am, I wouldn't be writing all these at all. Just feel that I need to attend this problem somehow.
Any ideas?
